Our phones and social media dictate the way in which we date. It seems that dating has changed drastically over the past 15 years. No longer do we meet someone organically. We used to meet people at work or through friends. Now we do everything on line. Hoping that we will meet that perfect someone. It seems that we’re nervous to date someone who we see on a daily basis for fear of the complications that come with a work relationship. Or, so many people work remotely the chances of meeting others is severely diminished. Rather, we turn to the dating apps.
One would make the assumption, albeit incorrectly, that given the shear volume of individuals on line our chances of meeting that special someone increases. This is not necessarily so. Many individuals spend hours swiping past photos of people who if met organically might fit the bill. Instead, it’s very easy to find flaws with almost everyone. Or, you have found the perfect someone only to be out ghosted after your first contact.
It’s also extremely difficult to sense what someone might be like in person after a few text messages. Many individuals on these sites are there because they are shy or don’t have another way to meet someone. So, to these persons the task of sounding clever via a text message is impossible. They give up rather than trying harder. The person who receives the text rarely forgives an awkward exchange. The result instead is to get “xed” off the list.
Who would ever want to try online dating given all of these obstacles. Instead, many have resorted to just casual “hook ups” to help with the loneliness. These shallow connections result in further feelings of futility. There are some sites that make you spend some cash and a little more time answering questions which narrow the field, Not everyone sees the value in taking the time to say what they really want in a relationship.
Perhaps millennials (or any age individual) don’t know what they want in a relationship. Not understanding clearly what you need and how to communicate those needs makes it almost impossible to find that perfect match. Individual therapy can help such persons learn what they are looking for from a relationship. If you’ve been in a destructive relationship therapy can help you identify the warning signs before moving too far along in the new relationship.
But, perhaps we never quite get to this point. Instead individual counseling would focus on why you cannot seem to connect with others at all. Therapy can help you get past the road blocks that you set up for yourself. Bottom line - you deserve happiness in your life through a fulfilling intimate relationship and individual counseling can help get you there.
If you are interested in changing the patterns that keep you isolated, and lonely don’t hesitate to call. One of our very skilled therapists is here to help you work through these issues and learn new solcial skills. Call us , email or text us today! (312)955-0319, info@greaterchicagocounselingcenter.com or (847)814-1257.